All alone

Chillaxing while waiting for time to pass at Juice works. I'm reminded of the time I spend with my mom at KLCC's juice works. Just the two of us, sharing a drink after a long walk. Just talking about the things we bought or just randomly looking at passerby. 

Now, I'm all alone doing the same thing. 

SCAM alert!

My dad forwarded an email from "TNB" the other day. This is how it goes.

From: "TNB , Kuala Lumpur" <tnb@cc.ncue.edu.tw>
Date: December 5, 2014 at 4:06:58 PM GMT+8
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
Subject: TNB Eksklusif
Reply-To: tbn_claims@outlook.my

Tenaga Nasional Berhad
(TNB HQ) 129 Jalan Bangsar,
59200 Kuala Lumpur,
Kuala Lumpur,
Malaysia



Ini adalah satu pemberitahuan rasmi daripada ibu pejabat daripada Tenaga
Nasional Berhad sempena Persatuan Air Malaysia (PAM) untuk memaklumkan anda
mengenai Hadiah Khas Eksklusif Tenaga Nasional Berhad Akhir Tahun  dan kami
Kami dengan gembira mengumumkan alamat e-mel anda sebagai salah satu
daripada 7 alamat e-mel yang dipilih semalam yang diadakan di ibu pejabat di
Kuala Lumpur.

Dilampirkan disini Nombor Rujukan TNB-1187-48901 dengan Nombor kelulusan,
TNB / 2012-087 /KL, dan nombor bertuah, TNB / 7071KL-733 yang memenangi MYR
150,000.00 (Seratus Lima Puluh Ribu Ringgit Malaysia Sahaja), alamat e-mel
anda dipilih dari pangkalan data ibu pejabat lembaga program Tenaga Nasioanl
Berhad dan TNB memberi MYR150,000 kepada 7 keluarga yang bertuah menerima
mesej rasmi ini melalui e-mel sebagai pampasan 1 Malaysia.

Hadiah ekslusif Akhir Tahun TNB berjumlah  MYR150,000.00 akan dikeluarkan
kepada anda melalui bank antarabangsa. Oleh kerana rombakkan beberapa nombor
dan nama, kami meminta anda menyimpan mesej ini untuk diri sendiri dan tidak
akan sama sekali mendedahkan kepada pihak TNB sehingga tuntutan anda telah
diproses, dan hadiah anda dimasukkan ke dalam akaun anda, kerana ini adalah
sebahagian daripada protokol untuk mengelakkan penyalahgunaan nombor bertuah
anda.

Untuk memulakan tuntutan TNB anda, anda dikehendaki mengisi borang pengesahan
di bawah dan mengemukakannya kepada ejen tuntutan anda,Puan Zailina Bt Zainal
Abidin bagi membolehkan beliau menjelaskan fail anda dan membayar dengan
segera.


Jabatan Ganjaran TNB
Zailina Bt Zainal Abidin
TEL: +60163774909
E-Mel: tnb_claim@outlook.my

Nama Penuh:
Alamat Bil:
Umur:
Warganegara:
Nombor Telefon Rumah:
No. Pengesahan dan Rujukan Hadiah:

NOTA: Untuk mengelakkan kelewatan atau pembatalan, sila lampirkan bersama
Nombor Rujukan dan Nombor Pengesahan TNB dalam semua urusan surat menyurat
dengan ejen anda di dalam e-mel ini.

Semua wang hadiah mesti dituntut tidak lewat dari  tarikh 20 Dis, 2014. Apa-
apa tuntutan yang tidak dibuat mengikut tarikh ini akan dikembalikan kepada
Tenaga Nasional Berhad, Malaysia.

Tahniah !! Sekali lagi
Saya yang menurut perintah,
(Nor Fadilah Binti Samsudin)
Setiausaha Publisiti TNB
© Copyright 2014 Tenaga Nasional Berhad
Semua hak cipta terpelihara.

Apart from all the bank scams, this is the very first time I've encountered email from TNB. Don't know how they got my dad's email, but seriously, MUST BE AWARE of all these scams!

Any uncertainties, do check back with the authentic or legal body.

Why is it suspicious?
Look at the sender's email. "tnb@cc.ncue.edu.tw" .. .edu? really?
Reply to. tbn_claims@outlook.my .. TBN? outlook?
The email address doesn't match each other. The one from the person incharge name has less of an 's' in the 'claim' word. I wonder if  they put ladies name just so it is less suspicious. Also some typos which I could let it pass..

And this paragraph..
" kami meminta anda menyimpan mesej ini untuk diri sendiri dan tidak akan sama sekali mendedahkan kepada pihak TNB sehingga tuntutan anda telah
diproses, dan hadiah anda dimasukkan ke dalam akaun anda, kerana ini adalah
sebahagian daripada protokol untuk mengelakkan penyalahgunaan nombor bertuah
anda."

This is so to make sure you don't call up TNB for verification.

Like my dad said, "IF you want to give me free money, just send a cheque to me. With my name on. Don't ask me to reply/send my other details."
 
 

Board on !

When someone said to me "Let's play board games!", automatically my mind is thinking Snake N' Ladders or Monopoly or even Scrabble. I used to love all these games when I was a kid. Every now and then I would look forward to play board games with my family (even though I'm bad at it). Now that we're all grown up, we no longer spend much time together to play such games anymore. Moreover, with the technology, we can always play such games on computer or even on our smartphone. With that, we can even opt to play with computer or online with other players. Doesn't that sounds like we're going into the introvert mode? Well, hello technology.

I don't know how or what triggers, my bf's high school friends has this weekend activity where we'll all gather at someone's house to play board game. I was a little bit intimidated at first when he invited me to join him for the game. Well, as I have mentioned, I'm bad at it. What more, they're seasoned players! That wasn't the first weekend they have the board game activity. I don't know either when did the board game came back to life!

 The first time I went over to play board games, I was astonished with the number of boxes of BOARD GAMES variety they have! It's not Monopoly or Snake and Ladders anymore. Roughly about 20 or more? I was amazed at how they keep the cards so well, with card sleeves and all. I didn't have much interest in board games at that point. In fact, I was a little awkward to begin with. I agreed to go initially was just to accompany Jon. In the end, I join in with another group for another game. I enjoyed myself very much. I forgot what was the name of the game, but it is something like building and expanding your land. 

After both group ended their games, next we played the Card against Humanity ! It's really hilarious how we made up the answers with our cards that doesn't make sense and still make it sounds legit.

Last Saturday, I was reluctant again to go for the board games. I still feel awkward, because I don't know much about the game rules. This time around, Jon brought his beloved Dead of Winters where he bought from Canada to the session. I enjoyed it pretty much the fact that it is co-op game and I can directly asked what does what do meantime to learn the game, because no one is playing against each other. 

This game is fun where we need to think of strategies and there is difficulty to pick from. I really enjoyed it.

GAAHH! The zombies are added!

Then we played BANG! where it is some sort like the police, civilian and thief game, but with different characters and different objectives. It's really hard for me to learn the game initially because its explanation are through symbols and the rule book is long. But once I got the hang of it, it is fun ! 

We played until 2AM before Jon and I head back. The rest of them continued until 4am I heard. =X .. Now that I've learned to play, I kinda look forward for the next one! IF his friends don't mind that I join along.

Don't everyone of us wish we could turn back time?

Another randomly stuff.

Sometimes when you tried too hard whether you're trying to be someone you're not or just to fit in to this realistic society, you're just gonna wear yourself out.

You to just be who you are. They'll just gonna have to accept you for who you are. Who cares. I live happily. Who cares if I wasn't socially accepted? Why do I have to follow the so-called society opinion of how I dress, how I talk, how I walk?

If you don't like how I dress, would you buy me clothes?

If you don't like how I talk, would you sit and teach me how to ?

If you don't like how I walk, would you carry me?

Rather than just covering one side of your face and talking about how other people are not as good as you think you are, why not telling them directly so they know or acknowledge, but leave it to them whether to follow your advice or not?

Just random thought. I know I'm gonna sound like hypocrite for this post. But that's just what I thought of. One of the random thoughts moment. :)

work & play @ penang

Phew, just got back from a tiring but adventurous trip at Penang! 

It's been a while since I went for a random unplanned food adventure with Jonathan ever since he went for work in Canada. Boo. Oh! Did I mention that he's back? YESSSS.. My darling is back in KL! Anyway, I got quite a last minute trip to client's site at Penang on Thursday. 

The option given to me was to take a return flight or to drive there. I was actually quite reluctant to go there just because I'll be out of my comfort zone and I didnt really want to take a cab around simply because I don't like taxi. Just my personal prejudice. Sorry if it's offensive. So I took the second deal where I asked to stay a night earlier and extend another night later and drive myself there. And dragged Jon along with me!

I was on leave on Wednesday so happens because it was our couple anniversary. ☺️ So we went ahead to Penang. That night for dinner, I brought Jon to my family usual dinner spot, Jelutong night market where there are lots of hawker stalls since I wanted to bring this 3-months-Canadian to enjoy our local food. Saw and greeted my uncle who was there packing up his stall. Must be good business for his Claypot Chicken Rice for closing his stall so early! 

 I introduced Jon to Hokkien Mee which was good there and my favourite Duck Kuey Teow Soup(Didn't take any photo.. We were too hungry) . We enjoyed the eclipse of the moon while having our noodles! Before heading back to hotel, we bought fried belacan chicken skin to munch on our way back.

Day 2: I head to work client's site and work goes as usual for me, except Lunch time where Alvin brought me to meet up with our Syntronic Penang colleagues! Alvin really helped me a lot during this trip  to Penang, keeping me comfortable while John is busy having his training. Thanks, Alvin! That being said, our meeting got delayed to 5pm, ended at 7pm. I was glad that I drove there actually. Give me so much flexibility on my time.

Day 3: The highlight of the day was the team lunch and dinner with my babe! We had lunch at Queensbay mall at a Chinese restaurant. I feel sorry for Yet Zhen though. She coordinate for us even though she wasn't feeling well.

Didn't manage to capture the full dishes because everyone can't wait to dig in!

Mandate from John before we dig in, take group photo first!!

Back to office where coincidentally they have a appreciation tea break. Food again! And it was arranged right in front of my cubicle! Though I can't see the food, I can SMELL IT! And I got swiss roll!! Apparently it's a boss treat. I don't know which boss though =X

 it's mango flavoured!

That night I adventured with Jon to look for ikan bakar at batu maung! I heard from my ex manager that it was good, so we gave it a try. IT WAS GOOD! The price was decent.

Worth the travel. =D

Day4: "What do you want to eat?" that has always been a tough question when you have no particular craving. Since Jon has laksa in his list, I suggested asam laksa! Tips and reviews on Foursquare is really helpful! We got to know Air Itam's laksa opens at 11:15 which is out of our schedule. So we planned for Balik Pulau's. Not too bad. They have 2 different flavours for a bowl of RM3.50 for a small one. 

The normal asam laksa, 

Siam laksa. Or you can choose mixed. We ordered Ambrah juice with sour plum too!

Yummy!! Then we went to shop for local biscuits! Then we googled for other nice food in Penang and popiah caught Jon's eyes. We adventured to Padang Brown's hawker stalls where we explore more food there.

Cendol was pretty normal.

Funky taste of crab meat!

This sotong kangkung is such a RIP OFF!  Probably she knows I'm not local. I was charged RM10 for this. I wouldn't encourage to try. Nothing special. Boo.

Anyway, that was the end of the trip adventure! And all the way back home I was quite sleepy and I'm glad it rained. It wasn't so hot and it keeps me focused!.

Ok, sleep. Dad asked me to go for jog tomorrow. But but... I've already used up my exercise quota for the year!!

And then there were four.

I was browsing through my old hard disk when I found some older pictures.

Happily browsing through the folders as I looked at my baby photos and those days when I was just wee high.

And then I came to the folder with a very random title I had, "lols" with only 2 photos inside.

I couldn't recall where we were but as I remember, this was one of my mom's company trip. My mom seems to love this picture a lot. This is her Facebook profile picture. I remember one of the comments was from my aunt saying that we were so happy in this photo. Indeed we were.

And I browse the next photo.

Couldn't hold back my thought when I saw the next photo.
We were the only 4 left now.Mom, are you looking at us like this from above? We live happily, don't worry about us. We will take care of each other and dad too. The family has grew! Now I have 2 sister in laws, you have 2 daughter-in-laws and your long awaited cucu (grandchild). She's healthy and happy little baby Natalia.

I love you, mom and I miss you so so so so so much.

Random craving

Randomly strikes me when I am hungry in office now, and it rained just now!

Rolls of fried fu chuk with fish paste, dipped into hot boiling soup. YUMM!!! *craves*
Yong tau foo would be the closest to satisfy my craving ~ OMG. Salivating already!

Here's some random image.

Image from Google

Can't wait for dearie to come back to eat all these food!

Can't wait!

30+ more days till my dearest be back from Canada! ^^

I can't wait for his return!

So I could end the pain.ㅠㅠ

Boo.

Work isn't much progress today.

Tomorrow is Friday. Which we have demo usually to customer.

I'm not prepared.

Can't stop feeling pressured because work isn't done yet.

My timeline is red once again.

I can't afford to reduce the hours anymore.

Listening to One OK Rock's Notes' n' Words to make myself calm.

Tonight meeting the girls!

I hope I can relax with this midweek outing.

headache. pfft.

misses you

Just saw a mother and daughter walked past me, holding hands. Can't help but shed a tear.

JELLY!

Jelly jelly jelly!

My dearie has been posting me a lot of photos of his food porn at Canada. It all look so delicious! I want some! He doesn't seem to get bored of western food yet though. I just hope he takes good care of his health.

But it seems that he's enjoying his days there. That's good for him. Can't wait for him to come back! ^^

I love you dear! ^_^

Notes n' Words

Randomly loving this song.

Notes N' Words by ONE OK ROCK

I wanna dance like no one's watching me 
I wanna love like it's the only thing I know
I wanna laugh from the bottom of my heart
I wanna sing like every single note and word it's all for you
Is this enough ?

I wanna tell you and this is the only way I know
And hope one day you'll learn the words and say
That you finally see, what I see 
Another song for you about your love
'cause you love the me that's full of faults
I wish you could see it from this view
'cause everything around you is a little bit brighter from your love

I wanna dance the night away with you
I wanna love because you taught me to
I wanna laugh all your tears away
I wanna sing 'cause every single note and word it's just for you

Hope it's enough ?

I wanna tell you and this is the only way I know
And hope one day you'll learn the words and say
That you finally see, how I feel
Another song for you about your love
'cause you love the me that's full of faults
I wish you could see it from this view
'cause everything around you is a little bit brighter from your love

Not a day goes by that I don't think 
About you and the love you've given me 
I wish you could see it from this view
'cause everything around you is a little bit brighter from your love
Life is just so much better from your love

Loving ONE OK ROCK! ♥

Breathe, Jo, breathe.

WHAT? I'm turning into a workaholic?

I may seem that way. I mean, I love my job. I love how when I finished my codes, it is working. The satisfaction gives me relief and excitement! Perhaps that's why it seems as though I'm a workaholic. I seek for perfection (though it may seem not perfect). I know I could always ask for delay if I know that the time is tight for me, but I like to push myself just so I know I can do it actually.

I'm totally fine with working the extra hours just so I could complete my task. They say I'm like that because I'm new. Maybe. As long as I have the passion or the fire, I don't see why not?

I feel even though it may not be healthy to think about work all the times but I don't mind doing it. As long as I know how to find some excitement to balance it along the way~

OK! Back to work. I just thought of some possible solution =D

Slacker.

Hey, I haven't been posting again about my little niece lately haven't I? She's pretty much growing up healthily! Just that she caught some cold the other day. Poor her. Anyway, she's still as adorable as ever! 

I'll just post some photos of her to make you guys kyaaa about.

No, she can't sit on her own yet

She's tilting towards the left. Haha. Because there's no support!

There's a lot more pictures of her. But I'M  KEEPING IT ALL TO MYSELF! It's MINE!! This cutie pie is MINE! Wait. My brother's and sis-in-law's but I'm just gonna be selfish and not share more picture of her with you guys!

Ahhh... Ok, back to work. So lonely in my station right now. 

Coffee anyone?

It would be nice if she's still around to see her grandchild growing up each day.

It's been a year.

This time around in year 2013, I was busy going back and forth from home to hospital. From office to hospital during my lunch hour and from hospital to home after work. It didn't feel tiring to me at all. If time and situation allows, I wanted to stay by your side to take care of you. 

Nothing hurts me more than remembering your last words that you muttered to me. "I'm cold", when they put on that oxygen mask on you. Then they put you into sleep to lessen your pain. You never wake up ever since. Doctor said to let you have more rest, but you didn't wake up ever again after they stopped the sedation for 3 days. The final third day was the last day I saw you on the hospital bed. 

I feel so useless couldn't help you at all. I could't stand it when doctor gave us the news that your brain had swelled up even surgery is risky. "First her internal organs, now even her brain? What went wrong? If only I was smart. If only I was a great problem solver that could solve every problem in the world." I felt so helpless. I went over to look at her from the ICU's window. A doctor told me that he's afraid that my mom couldn't make it. It felt so surreal that I heard that from a doctor with my own ears. I thought that only happens in drama. I called my brother that instant to come back from JB. 

Doctor told us that they want to observe mom for some time and told us to go back. I went back to office eventhough I've already informed that I'm taking an EL. I need the distraction. I was wrong. I couldn't focus on my work. I received a call from the hospital few minuteslater after my meeting. A call from hospital. Breaking the bad news to me. 

Rushing to hospital and I wish that call wasn't real. I was wishing that things wasn't as bad as how the nurse described. As I reached to the room, mom was still on bed, motionless, 'sleeping' from the sedation. I told her to hold on, the rest of them have not reached yet. I don't know what else I could do. My mind wasn't thinking and not prepared. I didn't even record her favourite playlist on my phone. All I can do was hope that the radio plays some of her favourite song that time. 

Soon after the rest of my family reached. Mom still didn't wake. Moments later a nurse came in and asked us not to take so long. She was afraid that her body would harden and that would make their job dofficult to wrap the body. I couldn't get her at first. I can still see her blood pressure from the machine. It still has some response. Doctor explained later that it was the machine that's givingg the response. It wasn't from her. She had left the world some time ago but he didn't stop us from being in there. 

I cried as I stood outside the ward. A stranger lady after knowing what happened hugged me. I don't know what else I could do besides crying. I felt so useless. 

It isn't easy to move on. Even after a year. I have not moved on. Everyday I still have the hope that that was just a nightmare and mom has just gone for a vacation without us. That one day I would open up the door to see her sat on the sofa with her netbook playing frontierville and greet me with a smile. Then ask me how was my day at work.

30th July. The day you departed from worldly suffering. May you rest in peace in God's arms forever, mom. I miss you. I love you. 

Alcohol much?

Hihi, I haven't been posting a lot haven't I? Lately I've been busy with my work. OT OT OT. That's all my work life is. I'll admit I wasn't as good as the rest of my colleagues, so I need to spend more time doing my work. It's not like I'm getting paid for it anyway. Just my sense of responsibility. 

ANYWAY, why the random post since it basically sounds like I'm just ranting here? I actually wanted to share my weekday at home! 

It's Raya first day and I'm spending it at home unpacking & cleaning my house. But first, I had a huge meal in the morning! Dad randomly suggested dim sum. So we adventured to kepong. Randomly looking for dim sum place since we don't know where to go. There were few dim sum restaurants here at Kepong and it's all full house! We were in luck to found a seat. 

We ordered like there's no tomorrow.

Wrapped with BACON!!!!

We happen to be in luck with 2 custard buns left.

Their glutinous rice with chicken tasted good as well! It's soft and smooth. 

I shared with dad.

Back home after that with a round tummy. Back to the coolie work of unpacking and cleaning up my house. 

I was quite disgusted at the scavengers at the dumpsters where we threw our rubbish. They're just waiting there to pick up our rubbish. No offence. Though it's not wrong for them to pick up rubbish. 

Night, after dinner I had a father-daughter session with my dad. 

 Opened up a bottle of red wine for random reason of nothing. Lately it seems like dad has been training me for alcohol. I don't know. The other day we had beer with KFC. 

Well, it was nice regardless. ^^ 

We still have cans of beer in the fridge for two. =O 

Misses you. :(

I just sent you off at airport last night. It's already feels like it's been so long. Like it's already a week or a month!

Ahh... It's only 24 hours. I'll need to be strong for another 91 days! Thankfully there's technology. I'm still able to chat with you while you are far away and in different time zone. I was so glad to get your message this morning as you were waiting for your transit. Now I'm just eagerly waiting for your next message to know that you have arrived in your destination safely :)

I love you darling! 91 more days to go!! Don't worry about me, I'll take good care of myself and your family while you're away ^_^ 

Random birthday post.

This year around I got to celebrate my birthday multiple times too!

I got an early celebration with the girls! A surprised one.. I mean, an unexpected, but not surprised. HAHA. I join their usual mid week meet up at a restaurant in KL. Very usual, we chat, we eat then at the end, I suspected something when the waiter suddenly clear up our table and comes back with 4 small plates and forks. Must be boss YS signaled them when she went for washroom. Come to think of it, no wonder she went for so long. Then the waiter comes with a box of cake. Yes, the cake is still in the box. LOL. It was very obvious, obviously. So E tried to cover up by saying that the girls were celebrating her birthday again since hers was 2 weeks back only.

Knowing that something is off, I tried to offer myself to put on the candles. To what I've guessed, the cake was mine. I acted surprised because they attempted a surprise for me last year but I found out earlier and ruined the fun. HAHA.

Anyway, I appreciate that a lot! Thanks girls!!

Then an early dinner from my deary at our favourite burger joint.







On the day of my birthday, I took leave from work. It was also the 2nd anniversary since I started working. I had some official thing to deal with in the morning so I couldn't get a longer rest on that day. Regardless, I got to spend the morning with my dad and on the afternoon, I went out with my dear. Claiming some freebies! HAHAHA.

Deary drove me to OU to hang out.
Took some selfie on the way.





It was a short outing, but I truly enjoy the hang out with deary when he specially took leave just to accompany me on my birthday!







Went home for dinner that night to celebrate with my family. Jon joined us too. Just a simple Chinese cuisine. I enjoyed the simplicity. What matters is the thought. Then another cake back at home where we had some photo session. I didn't get any of the pictures from my brother's or dad's phone. But it was a good day and night.

Thank you guys for celebrating with me this day when I got another year older. ♥♡♥♡♥

Congratulations !

Feels like it was weekend when I attended my brother's Registration of Marriage (R.O.M) since it was a public holiday.

My brother had always dreamed of this day since he decided the "nice" date to his interpretation. May 13, 2014 or his interpretation, 13.520.14 . Chinese would easily guessed why he chose this date. It means "I love you, forever". It's not such a hard guess, just need to be a little creative and you'll see it. Regardless, they have finally tied the knot ! Come to think of it, both my brother got married on a memorable date. Hehe. No, I'm not hinting anything here ! =P

It was my first time experiencing such R.O.M, there was so many couples there too! It definitely took less than 30 minutes to sign the paper, but I definitely hope that they would last forever. Though this elder brother of mine does annoys me from time to time, but I surely hope after this, he would think maturely and be a good husband. I guess my sister-in-law is still shy with me so I hope through this, we could bond together better :)

Here I congratulate both of you once again and I know mom would also bless the both of you with happiness from where she is now.

Signed! Can't run away already!

Welcome to our family, dear sister-in-law !

P/S: MAKE BABIES FOR ME TO PLAY WITH ! (~ ^ O ^)~

Hmm...

Has been quite stressed out with work lately.
I feel like I have a bigger responsibility now since I'm now part of the main member of the project.

It's not like I didn't manage to cope in what I'm doing right now.
I just feel like since I'm part of the main member, I should work harder.
I guess I'm pushing myself too hard.
I should relax. I should.

It's not like the task in my hand never got completed or always delayed.
I delivers them on time or even earlier at times. So I guess I'm starting out fine.
I need to build up on my confidence.

Or else, I would go crazy.
To err is human !

I feel much better now after I let it off my chest.
I just need somewhere to rant, where else would it be if it's not my own blog?

Here's a potato.

Aunty loves you!

Hey there baby Natalia, this would be my first time carrying you !
Why are you making faces =(

Carrying baby Natalia

From the picture it seems that you are glowing! You pretty much glowing in our heart anyway. Just want to welcome you to the family. Finally meeting you in person that day. It was my first time carrying a new born too! I feel as though they are so fragile, so don't mind the awkward hand, okay?

Your dad has been sending me photos of you lately. And I can't help myself from screaming "Kyaaa" on every picture! You're just so adorable!

Can't wait till you grow up a little and I'll spoil you with gifts! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Cleaning up

While I'm writing this post, I'm actually cleaning up the inactive blogs that I used to stalk. It has always been at the bottom most of the list of gadget I have in here.

Let's see what I have discovered.

Some of the blogs are remove. Some seems to have parasite on them. Their blog are either completely empty or with some random post. Look at this blog that used to be Joline's,

I don't think this is Joline's anymore.

Some has gone emo. Hey you, cheer up! (Though you haven't been updating anymore lately)

Some has no updates at all since the last time I read them. 

As for me, I've been quite inactive in blogging. I don't blog everyday anymore like how I used to be. At least I tried to. =)

I guess I've lowered down to blogging only once a month? Or less. Or much lesser. I don't know. Since I don't have target readers. I'm basically just blogging because I like to.

~Listening to One by Tohoshinki~

Welcome to the family =D

Look how tiny it is compared to my palm !!

I am so excited. It was my first time touching a pregnant lady tummy yesterday.
After getting permission from my sister-in-law to touch her proud big belly that is =D

Probably because she's about to due. Her tummy is so solid !
Too bad I don't get to touch it when they say the baby keeps moving inside her womb.
I bet that would be cute.

So while folding her little clothes yesterday, I can't help thinking how tiny they were!
So adorable !

Now, I just need to wait to be an aunt and start spoiling my niece =P

Surviving without smartphone: Day 0.75

Got my phone back from Jon today.
Finally.
Reading all the spams that I missed since Friday night.

It's really difficult for people to contact me without my phone (thanks, captain obvious)
Jon has to pass the message through my dad to me if I'm not on skype.

To cut long story short, it has been trouble since my phone wasn't with me. So happens I have appointments this weekend so my phone has been bombarded with text messages and missed calls.

Thanks dear for taking care of my phone and relaying the message for me.
Sorry for the trouble.
Love you ^^

Surviving without smartphone : Day 1

What? Surviving without my smartphone? NYUUUUU!!!!
Just kidding.

This is the first day (or night, since I'm writing this at night) of me, living without my smartphone.
But why would I do that?
It's not intentionally. I left my phone at Jon's house after having dinner at his place.
Left it charging there. =(
I only noticed it when I got back home and I'm too sleepy to drive all the way to Jon's place again.

So I took up a little challenge with myself to survive without my smartphone for a day.

It wasn't such a tough day.

I've been busy the whole day anyway.
Started my morning with a favour from my brother, then run some errands and chores and some personal appointment.
Ding dong here and there then after dinner, here I am, sitting in front of my laptop writing how I survived the day without my smartphone.

Seems simple? It is actually quite simple.
All I need to do is just fill my time with some other things that I don't have to do with my smartphone.
I actually spend more time talking with my dad than just staring at my phone being obsessed with Candy Crush or 9gag or even manga.

Sorry ifI didn't reply any calls or messages though. I'll get my phone back after I'm done with another appointment tomorrow =D

New banner?

Yeah, just a random banner I created using Gimp.
Still prefers Photoshop over Gimp though.
But since I don't have the license.. so.. pretty much just a simple one.

"Why change then?" 
Just because, I'm bored.

The reason..

I feel envious when I saw friends' posts appearing on my timeline when they got back from their holiday. I wanted to go too.

I honestly feels like we should travel while we're still able to. But there are many factors holding me back.

Top reason why I'm so reluctant to go on long holiday or hangouts is because I'll have to leave my family behind. Especially nowadays, my dad. Since mom has passed away, I feel like I have a bigger responsibility to accompany him at home. "Why don't you leave it to your brothers?". You don't understand. I have two brothers. "Then it'll be even better? There's two even!". No, you still don't understand. One of them have communication problem with my dad. They'll end up quarreling in a matter of time. Another is working outstation. The only one who spends most time with my dad, is me.

Sometimes, I feel guilty when I have to leave dad to eat alone for dinner. Especially on weekends when everyone has their own plans and dad stays at home.

Another reason is $$. I'm saving up for the future. Just in case anything happened, at least I have some cash for backup. I kinda learned that after mom's passing.

Friends will be like, "hey, you never hangout with us anymore." I'm really sorry. I just couldn't go against my conscience. But there will be some of the time that I'll take a break from this. Dad needs to have his own time too :) . I wish you guys could understand. I know I've been such a trouble to be included in your travel plans, I sincerely apologize for that.

I do admit that there's drastic changes in my life now. I'm slowly coping with it.

There are many things now in my hand that my dad just threw to me to train me handling the "adult world". Dealing with legal people and authorities. Yeap, this is his way of welcoming me to the adult life. Though I'm quite clear on why he doesn't throw them to my brothers, I still whine from time to time. "I should act as my role being the youngest one and couldn't care less about the family and be spoiled". Stereotypically. But actually, I'm glad that I'm being trained this way. Now I got to learn from my dad while I can. I got to learn things that even my brothers doesn't know =D

Yes, this is MY blog.

Happy!

Somehow today feels different. I have the drive to work. Usually I'll just drag my time. Maybe because I was waiting for the end of the day, so that I get to meet with my boyfriend.

I dated him for dinner tonight because he's on midshift and my dad has dinner. Otherwise, I would be all alone. So I took this opportunity.

I left earlier than usual, but was still caught in the KL jam. pfft. But regardless, I still manage to reach within his dinner time.

When he told me that the dinner place would require to walk a bit. I didn't know we were required to walk that far. I was sweating the moment I reached the place, but it was all worth it! I get to walk with him and saw him in formal clothes ^^

Dinner was just so-so. I don't care, during the dinner, I was worried that we would bump into his colleagues. I am shy. HAHA. Gladly, we didn't.The usual place that he said would normally filled with his colleague at that hour was empty. I thought luck was on my side.

Walking back, we saw his colleague in a restaurant. That was fine, because he was seated inside. Just wave and say goodbye. But, later on the way back, we met up with his whole team! Oh am gee. I didn't know if my face were flushing because of the hot weather or was it because of the crowd. But regardless, Jon kinda intro-ed me to his teammates. I appreciate that, though it was just "Guys, meet Joanne. Joanne, guys." "Hi, Guys." Stood there awhile, then off we go heading back to his office.

My heart was definitely beating fast for some reason. I don't know why..whenever I meet new people and especially a big group, I'll get nervous. That is why I don't like to go in crowded area and even to social parties. I'm an introvert that way.

Nevertheless, I was happy today. Got to meet with le boyfie. ♥

dream actress?

It feels as though when she had passed away, she had became an actress.
A dream actress, where she appeared randomly in our dreams acting in many different scenes and settings.
One of it was just last night. I dreamed of her again.
This time it was a scene where Malaysia is at war with Japanese. LOL.
There's only the 4 of us, in that dream, my second brother was at JB.
So, we were trying to escape from the war zone, setting was at my housing area.

Sometimes it was at home, other times it was at random shopping malls or park.
I have no idea how that kind of dream happened, but it was great for her to be in my dream.
I miss her a lot.

I've learned to grow up since she is gone.

Just a random thought, if you're working, you should learn to be independent.
Parents can't take care of you forever.
Take the time now to learn from them, not counting on them nor taking advantage of their presence.
Take some time to understand them or just to accompany them. Talk to them.
You'll miss this moment that you'll never get to experience again once they're gone.

I knew a person who count on her mom a lot, (rather the mom still does things like chores for her even though she's already in late 30's). It's not like she couldn't afford or she's disabled, no offense, but I feel it should be the other way round now that her mom is already old.

Vday

Valentine's day. A day for all the couples to be together and celebrate this one day event. Where every malls is crowded and the road heading towards there is jam. Also, not to forget, gift prices increases that includes chocolate, soft toys, flowers, accessories or all sorts of fancy gifts !

This is the day to remind your boyfriend, or girlfriend, that you have each other. Showing your affection towards them. Well, is this the ONLY day that you remembers them? What about your family?

I believe couples should not only show an extra care or attention only on this day, but I do not deny the fact that having one special day like this makes it more meaningful to do so. It's just like birthday. Eating cake on your birthday means more than eating cake on any normal day.

To me, I don't deny that this day is special, but I don't require my boyfriend to spend extra bucks just for the items that is much cheaper if compared to any ordinary days. But he's sweet that way, when he surprises me.

That afternoon, I got a call from an unknown number (silly delivery boy) . Here goes the conversation.

Delivery boy: "Hello, ini Ms. Joanne ke? ( Is this Ms. Joanne?)"
Me: "Yes"
Delivery boy: "Sini ada hantaran bunga dari xxxcom, awak nak saya hantar ke atas ke awak datang lobi untuk terima? (Here is a flower delivery from xxxcom, do you want me to deliver to your office upstairs or do you prefer to collect them here at the lobby?"
Me: "*blur* Err... saya turun skarang (I'll come down now)"

When I received it, I was so blur that I called up Jon to confirm.. ^_^

I was embarrassed, but at the same time I was so happy. I even asked him if I could keep it inside the car first, because I was so embarrassed to go up to the office with the bright pink pillow and the roses.

I went into the lift to get to Basement. Only then I realized, I have no car keys with me. I was wearing dress/skirt that day, thus, no pocket and I was rushing down that I forgot to take them.

So I went up. Stood awhile at the entrance only to think what speed should I run to my station. I think I went quite fast. But I failed.

One of my colleague sat next to my station saw it. As I placed them down on my table, he stood up, and he took it real quick and raises his hand together with the gifts. OH AM GEE.
It's so embarrassing! As I was sitting at the end of the office, raising it up meaning it could be seen from the other end of the office.

I can't imagine how red my face were, my other colleague told me I was flushing red !
My manager came over to my stations after that and he asked me who gave it to me and what do I think about receiving flowers.

Honestly, I've said many times, I still feel that I don't prefer receiving flowers, because I don't know what to do with it after it wilt. :( It's sad to see them wilt.
Regardless, I was super happy.

After work, I met up with Jon and we went for dinner. Simple dinner at Ninja Joe's, our favourite burger joint. There were less people anyway, and they didn't charge extra.

On our way back, we passed by Victoria Station. The road  towards the restaurant was super jam. There's even queue outside the restaurant. We're glad we didn't have it at any fancy restaurant.

We went home early that day and I thought I could celebrate a little with dad, but he's not home yet. He was still with his colleagues. Oh wells.


Thanks babe for the surprise. ^_^
Happy Valentine's day.